Scary Trans Tales to Tell in the Dark

Lotta transphobia in this one. Ugly, hateful shit. I mean it. You’ve been warned.

The mice are getting bolder. Used to be I saw one once in a while, late at night, sitting at my computer when I should be asleep. I’d yell, it would scurry, the end. I am lying awake at 3:00 AM and because my noise-canceling headphones have snapped I have to be where I am and not off in DEEP SLEEP THIRD EYE CHAKRA BINAURAL BEATS 432HZ 8HOURS, which means I am raw-dogging my actual real life and it turns out my life includes mice, plural, rustling through the trash. How long has it been this bad? I feel like if I tell the landlord they’ll find some way to make it my fault. Maybe it IS my fault. Are mice a fault thing? When it’s 3AM and you’re lying awake trying to convince yourself that mice can’t climb up loft beds and wouldn’t want to even if they could, it feels like divine judgment.

Vermin. Fuck.

Children are dead in Nashville, and I want very, very badly to be the kind of person who is awake at 3 AM because children are dead in Nashville. But it is 2023, and people shoot children in America all the time now, and it doesn’t seem real to me unless I really sit down and make myself concieve of it. I close my eyes and imagine my niece and nephews on that endless list of dead kids, and the minute that starts to work I have to stop. Obviously.

No, I’m awake at 3AM with the rest of the vermin because Matt Walsh and Tim Pool and Andy Ngo and Benny Johnson and a caucophany of other assholes are…

There’s no way to be delicate about this: Yes. I am more concerned about the mean tweets about trans people, and I will tell you why: because thoughts and prayers are infamously unable to bring shooting victims back from the dead but your “mean tweets” are going to get people killed, Matt.

I think you know that. I think you hope they do.

It is looking more and more like the person who killed three children and three adults in Nashville, Tennesee on March 27, 2023, was trans. You can, if you feel called to do so, dig through the news coverage to figure out whether there’s some wiggle room or plausible deniability in there; I don’t personally care and in fact think it’s really important not to thrash on this point. My support for trans rights does not hinge on every trans person everywhere being a good and decent person. Just as there are garbage cis people, there are also garbage trans people. It's looking more and more like this shooter was one of them.

I can’t either, Walsh, none of us can. Fuck. It would be nice to see you expressing some kind of humanity if I could believe you meant it. Or rather, I believe you mean it this time because you are imagining a very specific scenario.

Walsh is imagining his beautiful children, with a father who is present and a home that is religous, massacred in their beautiful Christian school by some kind of bestial burgeoning hormone-poisoned demon. I know what the monster Walsh fears looks like because my YouTuber recommendations are fucked. Deranged freaks, perverts. I wrote about this a while back.

I made a Twitter thread this morning comparing the way Walsh responded to the Nashville shooting with the way he’s responded to shootings in the past, and Walsh replied that his inconsistencies are perfectly consistent actually, and now there are a bunch of cretins in my mentions telling me I’m stupid and calling me “sir” because wE cAn aLWaYs tELl. You can go read through it all or you can bang your head against the wall until you pass out, but here’s the two Walsh posts that matter mostWalsh in 2018, after the Parkland shooting:

Walsh in 2023, after the Nashville shooting:

I am checking my mentions and clapping back at idiots as I attempt to mouse-proof my room. All the garbage out, obviously: none of it seems particularly foul but what do I know, I’m the person filthy enough to have an infestation. All the food in plastic bins, everything that can’t go into plastic bins in the trash. I am shoving cheese and meat and grapes into various live-catch traps because the little bastards have been raiding the killing traps for weeks now and a Matt Walsh fan with a screenname that suggests a penchant for Rational Civil Dialogue is telling me that I really need to listen to Walsh’s show if I want to understand his position on Uvalde and Parkland and Sandy Hook. He helpfully forwards links to the entire Matt Walsh catalogue and I explain that I’m not going to spend the next five years searching for every time Walsh has mentioned school shootings. That I have compared Walsh’s immediate Twitter reaction to several other horrific massacres, that it’s apples to apples, that if he would like to provide me with specific examples that disprove my overall point I will of course peruse them.

He is polite about this. I tell him we can talk about the issues as I glance out my window at the sky. Plenty of light still. It’s not a good idea to throw my trash into the big bins outside after dark. The rats hate that. Last time I did it one ran out of the trashcan and over my shoe and I didn’t scream but I would rather it not happen again. Night time is rat time. You learn to live with it.

“We have documentation of TRAs (trans rights activists) promoting violence,” the man tells me via DM. “I don't think your side is going to be able to hide that. And I don't see any evidence Walsh or any DW (Daily Wire) pushes violence on trans people. They are ideological but they aren't calling on anyone to attack trans people physically.”

And it’s true. They never directly call for it.

Cernovich and Posobiec and Gonzales and and all the other ghouls out there think that pinning this horror on “trans ideology” is only fair because after all, isn’t this what the Liberal Establishment has done for years? Haven’t they pinned mass shootings on far-right and white supremacist ideology again and again and again and…

Here’s the difference. Are you listening closely? The logical final step of white supremacist logic is always murder.

If your race is being replaced

if your future is under attack

if giant-air-quotes-globalists are out to destroy your way of life and steal your women away

then your options are to lie down and accept defeat or rise up and secure the existence of your people and a future for white children. Anyone who takes such ideas seriously will arrive at the Turner Diaries eventally.

Compare this with the concept of transness writ large, which goes something like: while biology is constant, gender is a social construct. We made up different gender roles and we can and should challenge those roles. If people identify as or feel more comfortable living in a different gender than the one they were assigned at birth they have every goddamn right to live as that gender, to modify their body however they wish, to live a fulfilled and fulfilling life (or, as Contrapoints puts it, “to achieve the same level of sadness and dysfunction as everyone else”).

If you follow “trans ideology” to its logical conclusion, you will find yourself living openly as whatever gender you are and with whatever gender expression you choose. No nine-year-olds must die to abolish gender. It’s just…freedom. You know. America’s whole thing.

When a trans person grabs some guns and shoots up a school, they may be motivated by bitterness towards an unaccepting world, or abuse suffered as a result of being trans in a world that does not like that very much, or maybe it’s just the same caustic mercury-fume anger and boundless agony that leads cis men to grab guns and shoot up a school, who the hell knows: it isn’t the inevitable final step of fully embracing the concept of transness.

I will leave the inevitable final step of Walsh & co’s anti-trans rhetoric as an excercise to the reader. May it remain only an exercise, forever.

If these live capture traps don’t work I’m going to get some poison. if they die in the walls, they die in the walls. Furry little bodies raiding my trash at night, taking over my space, filling my room with filth and my weak bougie heart with terror. I believe in God, though not a particularly kind one, and I believe that every single one of us possesses a soul crafted in his image, and I believe that when we begin to treat human beings as vermin we end up in the same place every single time. Few outside of PETA would blame me for the genocide I may be forced to wreak upon these rodents because this is what you do with vermin, to secure your future and the safety of your children, and if we don’t all figure out a way to see each other as human, very quickly, we are going to find ourselves party to unspeakable horror.

If you’re a conservative and you’ve made it this far, I want you to know something very important. I do not hate you. I do not think you’re demonic or that your soul is bad. I know most of you do the things you do in an effort to save this dying world, that you expend all this energy to push your agenda because you care deeply about this country, just as I do.

But that's not what you're actually doing. And I am begging you to see that before it's too late.